Freeze! Don’t click that “post this entry” button. Slowly back away from the computer and take a deep breath. Think about the blog entry you’re about to publish — the one where you repeatedly mention the length (or lack thereof) of your ex-boyfriend’s manhood, or the one where you scold your ex-girlfriend for her frequent and timely headaches.

Maybe you want to get this bitterness out of your system, and truth be told, you may have many justifiable grievances. Perhaps he cheated on you with another woman, or she belittled you in front of your closest friends — but try to remember that you’re no longer dating. There’s no need to win this fight, because it’s already over. Your online negative campaign is a waste of your precious energy.

Naturally, you want your ex to suffer. Filled with adrenaline and hopped up on your newfound freedom, you’re tempted to furiously peck at your laptop and reveal the horrible stories that led to your infamous breakup. You secretly hope that your ex reads your scathing remarks about their starving libido or that they’ll find out you’re dating someone new.

Reasons to Not Press POST

Blogs have become powerful tools for the dissemination of information and opinions to people around the world, and abusing this beautiful instrument of communication will only serve to taint your reputation down the line. By posting that blog entry, you’ll only give your ex the justification they need to plead innocence to their friends (and your friends, too). “Just read their blog,” they could say, “and you’ll understand why I finally called it quits.”

[ad]And think about your readers. Your intimate jabs and jaded posts will likely incite them to respond with similar below-the-belt comments. They may call you psycho or prudish or god forbid unattractive, with the intent to goad you further into your self-sabotaging diatribes as they giggle from the sidelines.

Also consider the future repercussions of your blogging slander. Do you really want to ruin a cosmic connection with a new love interest because they google your name and uncover your insane tirade about some guy or girl you dated for a few months?

Face it … even if you’re publishing under a pseudonym and change the name of your ex, someone in your circle will inevitably stumble upon your blog, and then you’re really screwed. Or rather, you may never be screwed again once everyone in town discovers how much you enjoy bashing your exes behind their backs. A few scathing remarks may make you feel great for a hour, but when people in your little universe start to gossip and you notice a former friend giggling at you from the other side of the bar, see how great you feel then!

If you must blog, do it with some style. Talk about your own feelings instead of sticking it to your ex. If you’re writing while in the midst of fury and resentment, save your post as a draft and read it over a day later. Even if your former partner screwed you over royally, what will really disturb them is a lack of response. Cyber-slander won’t win your ex back, if they’re even worth a second chance. And why would you blog about them if they’re not?