Is there a certain blogger who spellbinds you with posts about sexual exploits or global politics or even celebrity gossip? Do they make you chuckle with turns of phrases and clever puns that seem to drive you crazy (in a good way)? If so, then you may be suffering from a common fever sweeping the Internet. Hate to break it to you, but you may have … a blogger crush. (Cue dramatic music.) Dum-dum-dummmmm…

But that’s understandable nowadays. As blogs and tweets become commonplace communication, it’s no wonder we start jonesing for the people behind the digital curtains we’re meant to pay no attention to. First off, they’re a mystery. Who the hell is this writer who can make you laugh? Who is this wordsmith who posts the things that make you go ooh? Secondly, you’re bonding over something you both love, be it obscure genres of music, books on tape, or your shared love for throat singing. Whatever your poison, all you know is that you never miss a post. Never!

Here’s the rub though: tracking down your blogger crush may turn you into an online stalker, which could not only destroy the blog itself but also ruin your chances for a real live meeting, oh my. Nobody wants to become a stalker after all. So how does one introduce themselves to an idolized blogger, turn the digital tables, and hopefully seduce the person behind the scenes, all without coming off like a complete and utter (and desperate) sleazebag or nut job?

• Comments are a start. Try engaging your blogger on their level. If you have something interesting to say or a powerful reaction to something relevant from their post, by all means respond by leaving a comment. Bloggers appreciate comments, not only because they bring them more traffic, but because they show loyalty and smarts to match, two particularly attractive traits, mind you. Whatever you do, don’t flatter your blog crush ceaselessly or pander to them like groupies. They’ll only ignore your mindless flattery and probably delete your comments anyway. Who would want an emoticon ruining their serious blog?

• You can always offer assistance, too. Bloggers will oftentimes provide email addresses where you can reach them. A simple introduction and some specific details about how you think you could help the blog might hold some serious weight when it comes to their opinion of you. They might even suggest a meeting to discuss some of your suggestions. You should probably avoid the ditsy teenage language and abbreviations (OMG, WTF, LOL, LMAO) in the beginning, at least. Words are powerful, and if you choose the ones that make you sound like an idiot, then guess what? They’ll think you’re an idiot.

Remember, the blogject of your desire might be spread thin, what with the thousands of visitors and comments left each day, so don’t get worried if they don’t respond immediately. Even bloggers have lives, you know. Naturally, you want to stand out among the rest, and you want develop a more personal connection with your blog-throb, so what’s a reader to do?

Really, you have two options: either (1) go for the gold and simply send them a message saying how much you dig their blog and how you would like to get a drink sometime, or (2) slowly play your hand, ask a few questions about how they got into blogging or how they know so much about whatever, and eventually suggest a meeting somewhere nice and public. Transitioning from the online to the real world is awkward and jilted most times anyway, so try to keep an open mind. But who knows? Blogic clearly dictates that two like-minded individuals attract each other, so you may be in store for a hot collision in the near future.

Related post: Slandering your ex on your personal blog