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Second Time Around: Reuniting via Twitter

14 December 2009 Leave a Comment by Meg Stivison

Reunited via TwitterYou’ve split up, but you’re still connected online.  He hasn’t defriended you, you haven’t bashed him on your blog. You can read his Twitter updates without cursing his name or bursting into floods of tears. In fact, as you read his witty 140s or visit his shared links, you’re starting to remember why you were attracted to him in the first place.

As we find ourselves checking in with Twitter throughout the day, we’re all in an ongoing conversation. But when you notice an increasing proportion of @ replies to and from a certain ex, you’re engaging with him throughout your routine, chatting with him whether you’re in the dentist’s waiting room or the back of a taxi. This is a prime opportunity to notice all those things you liked about him in the first place, and after a few conversations or a few as-friends excursions, you’re ready to give things another try.

Whether it’s been a few weeks or a few years apart, reuniting with an ex is heady excitement! I don’t mean a night or two of ill-advised ex sex (Don’t fall for it! NO!), but restarting your relationship.

Why It Works

After a split, you’ve been reminded of what you liked in the first place. You’ve had a chance to check out those greener pastures, and decided what you really want. If your romance fizzled out, this may be just the jolt of energy you two need to rekindle the connection.

When you and your sweetie reconnect, you both consciously choose to be together, which can result in an even stronger relationship than just staying together from dating apathy, or slipping into a semi-relationship with a hookup buddy. By getting back together after time apart, you’ve both decided to be in a relationship and you’ve both decided to make it good.

You have perspective now. Did you split over deal-breaking relationship disasters or minor imperfections? Dating around or returning to single life helps you figure out if talking over Dr. House is a dump-worthy offense. 

Why It Fails

Often the issues that drove you apart in the first place will resurface. Be especially wary of this if one – or both – of you has promised to change. The best intentions in the world can’t change a fundamental part of your character.

If you split over your partner’s actions, make sure you’re really ready to forgive and forget. His days of exchanging phone numbers on the sly may be over, but your relationship is still doomed if you can’t let it go.

There are other fish in the Twitterstream, so make sure it’s genuine interest and not just a bit of loneliness bringing you and the ex back together.

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