To get in the spirit, create custom Necco Sweethearts with their iPhone app — and then share them with your loves via Twitter.

For the Valentine whose iPod is always filled with the latest songs, we love these heart-shaped earbuds.

Mix tapes may be a thing of the past, but you can give a cute USB drive loaded with great tunes along with the earbuds. The real gift is the USB drive — a real geek always needs more storage space.

For the Valentine who is always batting her lashes to get what she wants, this Lashlight mascara is a perfect gift. Not only is the mascara’s formula innovative — it packs microscopic mirrors to reflect light — but the wand lights up. Perfect for touching up in the cab on your way to a late night booty call.

Decided you’re ready to make a sex tape? Or just trying to get cute videos with your sweetie? Any guy or girl would be thrilled to receive a super user-friendly Flip Cam. They have a slew of Valentine’s Day designs or you can personalize it with a picture of the two of you.

Skip the chocolates — a real geek will dig this tee with the molecular structure of chocolate on it instead….

Or wear your heart on your sleeve and proudly declare how you feel about the geek in your life.

For the selfless techie Valentine, check out these artist-designed iPhone covers. 100 percent of the profits go to the Red Cross and the relief effort in Haiti.

The Kindle is perfect for the Valentine who is always lugging around the latest bestsellers. Load it with love poems — we love when old-fashioned romance shows up on new technology — or trashy romance novels.

Single this year? Treat yourself to a subscription to Match.com — and a bright mini notebook where you can record all your exploits.

And instead of lingerie, we’ll be rocking this underwear and proudly declaring, that yes, we write about sex, and you better get used to it.









Comment below: What are you planning for your sweetie on V-Day?

• Lip Balm
• Manicure Kit/Shaving Kit (depending on winner’s gender)
• chocolates
• a coupon for a Match.com membership discount
• relationship expert Whitney Casey’s book “The Man Plan” (for the ladies)
• a free 1-month online movie rental subscription
• and more surprise goodies!

To be eligible to win, you must answer following question: What is the craziest thing you’ve done online to get a date or capture someone’s attention? (either via an online dating site, Twitter, Facebook, blogs, texting, etc.)

There are two ways to answer:

• Leave a comment on this blog post. You must of course leave a valid email address in the proper field so that we can contact you for your mailing address if you win. (Don’t worry, other readers won’t see your email address!)
• Answer on Twitter. To do this, you must:
  1. Tweet about this post – or RT our tweet about the giveaway
  2. In a second tweet, answer the question and include @techcoquette and the hashtag #MatchKit at the end
  3. Make sure you are following @techcoquette so that we have the ability to DM you to request your email address if you win

The winner will be whomever’s answer is selected unanimously by both Jeffrey Kishner and Rachel Wilkerson as the best, according to our subjective criteria. We will make our decision on February 10, so make sure you’ve left a comment or tweeted your answer by Monday night. We will announce the winner on the 11th and contact the winner so that Match.com can send them their goodies by the big day!

Granted, Cupid’s Lab has a novel concept here, and since texting at a bar or club is so common, the behavior required on the part of users requires no hurdle (beyond wearing a badge, which doesn’t feel so silly if everyone’s doing it.) But the whole exercise reminds me of high school (back in the day, when we didn’t text).

Agatha likes Ben. Agatha asks her BFF Cathy to find out if Ben likes her back. If Cathy asks Ben, “So what do you think about Agatha?” then Ben will surmise that Agatha likes him. If Agatha finds this too risky, she can ask Cathy to ask Ben’s buddy Dalton to ask Ben, “Hey, what do you think of Agatha?” If Ben says, “She’s hot,” Dalton can tell Cathy, who then tells Agatha. Agatha can then be more forward with Ben, or what have you.

The texting service just cuts out the BFFs and best buds. Instead of having an IRL (In Real Life) social network (like one has in high school), the service acts as single node to replace two other people. And this node only sends out, “S/he likes you” if it gets a positive signal from both. At one of these Cupid’s Lab parties, if you text someone’s badge number and get nothing back, you haven’t “lost face,” because the other person doesn’t know about it if they don’t text your badge number as well.

I’m not one to talk – I’ve never been terribly confident approaching someone cold, and besides, I’m married – but this new use of technology seems like a crutch. I mean, if you are attracted to someone at a gathering, you just go up to them and start a conversation, right? If you’re old enough to drink, you shouldn’t have to ask your BFF to find out if that guy thinks you’re cute. You send a clear signal, or you make the first move. There’s something about relying on an external source – especially when it comes to the “mating game” – that seems juvenile.

Unless we’re talking about matchmaking. Cupid’s Lab enables this, too. You can text the badge numbers of two people you think would hit it off, and they both get a notification that someone thinks they’d make a good match. In the real world, if you trust someone’s judgment and they match you up with someone, you’re essentially using them as a social filter. Complex algorithms used by some online dating sites serve the same function. Out of a sea of people, they choose people whom they believe will be compatible with you.

We don’t look for mates in a vacuum. Friends help make our search easier, either by vetting a potential mate or introducing you to one of their friends. In the age of text messages and social media, we can now cut out our trusted associates and rely on technologies that serve basically the same function.

But should we?

If intelligence is a turn on, you can tell if someone passes your test from their comments on blogs and their posts on your wall. Add to that a few pictures in their profile of choice, and you’ve already got a mean recipe for a romantic dish. While messaging each other, it hits you one afternoon: “Why aren’t I dating this interesting guy? Why aren’t I asking this wonderful woman out to dinner?”

The fact remains: you may have never met each other in person. All you know about one another is some details typed into a profile page and perhaps a few conversations you’ve shared about what you’re studying and where you work. No, you met online … and now you’re making half-playful, half-serious comments about dating, maybe even knocking boots. What happens when an online friendship starts turning romantic and you have never met in the flesh?

• Recognize the signals. Is he hinting at exchanging pictures, jokingly mentioning some revealing poses? (Guess what? He’s not joking!) Is she asking how long your previous relationships lasted and how they ended? (Really, she wants to know what a relationship with you might feel like.) Do you wonder if you would hit it off in your favorite places or if you can walk around together at the zoo laughing, without pulling out your hair in frustration?

• Make a move. Whatever the reason — maybe you dug her comments about Japanese subculture, or you saw a picture of his tattoos and felt the ping of attraction — the friendship soon reaches critical mass, and somebody has to make a move, or risk the fire fizzling out. Flirty emails can escalate to chats about your previous lovers (and maybe some hints about sexual fantasies). From chats, text messages and phone calls come more frequently, and in a matter of a few weeks, you’re both hinting at a meeting for a drink or coffee.

Don’t let the fact that you met each other online stop you from converting an engaging dialogue in cyberspace into a reality check for two. You may live happily-ever-after, or you may just become f-buddies who visit each other’s cities every now and again. Whatever happens, you’ll kick yourself later if you don’t turn off the computer and turn on the charm at your first date. Same person, just a different place.

Comment below: Have you found love on the internet even though you weren’t looking for it?

Related posts:

• Long Distance Relationships: Keeping the Flame Hot

• When Is It OK to Break Up Over Email?
• Overcome your resistance to online dating

Sometimes, I can hardly wait for a video to buffer or a new window to open without experiencing the sudden urge to toss my laptop across the room. No chance in hell I would have made it as a pioneer, no way, no how. Thank goodness we live in the digital age, where emails and phone calls can fan relationship flames so they don’t simply fizzle out in a week.

Long story short, dating and even sex have evolved as a result of technology, and we can now continue to develop our romantic and sexual lives through online communications. No more waiting for the telegraph from loved ones. Instead, you can open your email account or social network of choice and then burn some digital sheets. Truth is, even if thousands of miles separate two people, you might still want to keep them in your life, be your connection emotional, mental, or sexual, cybering … all … night … long.

There are technologies being used nowadays to not only keep lovers connected, but also to develop their relationship on a level never possible before. A steamy Skype chat while using a cam might give you an incredible orgasm, just as a midnight chat about your dreams of becoming a botanist or publishing a book might afford you the opportunity to open up to your partner and discover a much deeper level of intimacy.

Easier said than done, right? Not really, because here are some affordable (and often free) technologies that everyone can use, whether you’re trying to maintain a bond or revitalize and strengthen a connection. Whatever your motives, using the technologies mentioned below will definitely help you keep the spark alive, and perhaps even deepen your relationship.

• Emails — These babies are a necessity to long distance relationships! Everyone has an email account these days — most are free after all — and just dropping your boyfriend or girlfriend a little love note now and again can act as a huge demonstration of your commitment. Plus, you can reveal anything you want in an email: how you bombed your calculus final earlier today, or even how much you already miss the smell your lover left on your pillow the last time they slept over.

• Walls — Posting comments or links on someone’s social networking wall might not seem like it would make a huge impact on the relationship, but honestly, it does. A video of their favorite comedy show or even a link to a blog that details an inside joke you two share not only shows that you’re thinking about them, but also that you know each other inside and out.
• Chats — Practically speaking, chats are the single most useful form of technology a long distance relationship has at its disposal. Whether you’re using Facebook just to say hello or using Skype to talk to (and see) your boyfriend who’s currently studying abroad, chats allow you to communicate in real time, which means you don’t have to wait until the next day for an email update. Though the picture may be a bit pixelated and the audio may sound a bit rough, at least you’re in contact and engaging each other in conversation.
• Texting — Wherever you are, whenever you’re available, you almost always have your cell phone in your pocket or your purse. Something interesting or exciting happens — and bam! — you can forward a picture and a lovely text message to your lover, however far away. And just imagine their phone vibrating in their pocket, inches from their erogenous zone, already starting to anticipate your text with saucy thoughts of your next encounter…
• Cameras — Know anyone who hasn’t at least thought about the sexual potential of cams? You may be thousands of miles away, and you can still masturbate together with your loved one. Now that’s hot! Of course, camming isn’t as great as the touch of your lover, but sharing some online play and dirty talk is definitely the next best thing. In fact, this form of sexual exploration may open up the doorway to some experimentation the next time you meet in person — ooh-la-la!

So always remember — a laptop and a high-speed Internet connection can do wonders for your long distance relationship, and help you show emotional (and sexual) sides of yourself never explored before. Geography’s got nothing on our desires, and technology will always prove useful in keeping us connected and intimate for ages to come.

Comment below: How have you used technology to maintain a long-distance relationship?

Related posts:

• Confessing Your Relationship Woes to an Online Confidant: When Is It Cheating?

• When Is It OK to Break Up Over Email?
• In-game dating: Not just for basement-dwelling nerds

Since text messaging and online chats have drastically cut the distance between friends and former flames — there are no miles in cyberspace — we can now spill our guts to confidants around the world. However, this new digital convenience can open the doorway to some pretty serious and complex relationship issues as well. Jealousy for starters, and let’s not even bring up the paranoia you’d feel as your dating partner describes your shortcomings (however blown out of proportion) to an online buddy you know next to nothing about. Talk about frustrating and inconsiderate!

Of course, we do often need someone to confide in. Just talking to someone about what ails you is far from cheating, even if you’re chatting with an ex or an acquaintance with whom you used to burn up the sheets. A conversation can just be a harmless conversation after all, even if you are venting about some argument you and your lover just had. What causes problems is when you actively engage your confidant on an intimate level and deliberately hide it from your significant other.

As new handheld technology and online communities makes communication easier, dating etiquette has adapted, too. New questions arise. Is confiding in a person online a form of “emotional cheating” or not? Are you in safe waters if you’re retreating to the digital embrace of someone you could possibly date (or perhaps have dated in the past)? Basically, where’s the line between confidant and love interest nowadays? How easy has it become to keep your options open online even while you’re dating someone offline? Is jealousy over a digital powwow ever warranted?

Classic Suspicious Activity May Include:

• Hiding the whole truth from your lover. He’s only a friend. She’s not that attractive. Talking in circles around the issue at hand will only make your current lover that much more insecure and frustrated with you. Just like dating offline, you need to be straight with your partner. You can admit to an attraction — it’s natural to be hot for other people — but hiding certain details about your exchanges only breeds suspicion. Revealing details, though, can be helpful.

• Only calling when your relationship is rocky. What kind of signal do you send to your partner if you talk to one particular guy or woman whenever you’re suffering a relationship crisis? However inadvertently, you’re saying that you trust this random stranger – or worse yet, an old flame – with your personal feelings more than you trust the person you’re currently dating. Not such a pleasant thought!
• Being vague about your connection. Inevitably (and rightfully so), your lover will confront you about the relationship you carry on with your confidant — perhaps in a heated moment or the throes of an argument — especially if they’re a person to whom you could be attracted. When that moment comes, all the explanations and backpedalling in the world won’t save you from the evidence presented. Better to reassure your partner (and your confidant, too) long before this confrontation, so nobody gets hurt or has a misunderstanding.
• Keeping flirty, private messages secret. Are you keeping a secret folder with emails stashed from prying eyes? Are you deleting flirtatious texts or comments posted by your confidant? If so, you’re trying to get away with something. By keeping your developing connection with another person in the shadows, you’re really not helping, and it’s not as though you’re fooling anyone — maybe only yourself. It might be time to reevaluate your situation.
• Neglecting your partner in favor of conversation with your confidant. Has your boyfriend ever checked another woman out while you were on a date together? Has your girlfriend ever started flirting with a bartender or casual acquaintance, later claiming that she was simply being friendly? Neglecting the needs and desires of your significant other in order to log a few Facebook chatting hours with your confidant works according to the same principle, and it’s only a matter of time before your better half catches on and perhaps confronts you.

In short, always think about the tacit messages you’re sending your significant other as well as your confidant. If you’re going to converse about your current relationship with anyone, you need to reassure your love interest that everything is copasetic. You also need to let your confidant know that you’re not going to leave your current relationship for them either, and that no amount of online play is going to change that fact.

The last thing you want is to arouse suspicion in an unstable romantic situation, however temporary the argument or disagreement is. And if you’re trying to disrupt the relationship anyway by spending way more time with your confidant than you should, that’s probably a good indication that the time has come to either call the whole thing off or at least have a serious discussion about what you want for the future.

Related posts:

• Breaking up (on Facebook) is hard to do

• When Is It OK to Break Up Over Email?
• Slandering your ex on your personal blog

Comment below: Have you hidden your online confidant relationship from your partner?